5-26-09

Today I just had a mental brake down because I’m super stressed out about putting too much crap off. Like school crap. I know it’s bad but it’s just something I can’t help but do. Like with the Consumer ED stuff most of it I don’t understand and no one really seems to help me on it. I know I could get help on it but I just never feel like getting yelled at about staying after or come in early because for the most part this kind of stuff I don’t really care about even though I should. AAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! I just need to get out of school and be done with this kind of stuff forever. All I want to do is sit around and make my films and get things started and finished and made good. Stuff that a lot of people will like stuff people would like to watch. I want to not freak out about stuff anymore. I want to be able to just do stuff and not worry. I want to make my videos for me and my friends. I want to make a long epic video this summer and show parts little by little. Like something epic with a storyline or something to that existent. Yesterday I made yes I made Aaron cry because he at first made me mad. Well ok let me start from the top… Zeb, Aaron, and Aaron’s friend Andy where hanging out and we were having fun and stuff. Nothing bad about that until he started to talk more about The Zeb Show. Yes, everything is about The Zeb Show which to me makes me thing that my web show is something people hate or never want to work on. I never hear anyone think of an epically awesome new idea for the zapyc chibis. No it’s always about The Zeb Show. That made me really mad/upset and I ran off a kind of punched Aaron. I almost started to cry but didn’t want Zeb and Andy to see me cry. Well that in return made Aaron cry because he hurt my feeling and felt bad. Oh and also he was already depressed. Yes, as he says “He’s broken” I so don’t think he is. I just think he’s complicated… lol last night also Colin Aaron’s step dad told me he was a lot like Aaron at his age. Why well because he was that type of guy that would keep his emotions all in and that he was awkward also. Yea Colin just wishes he had as much luck as Aaron does now with the ladies… meaning finding a good as girlfriend as me. Today is good I just got off the phone with Aaron and at first he was like “I’m not going to make The Zeb Show anymore” then he changed his mind. I think he only wanted to do that because of yesterday. The whole fact that no one seems to like my videos at all. Mine never make any sense at all. I need to make some videos that make sense to others. Videos that aren’t crap like my first episode…… I just thought of an epic idea for a new episode….. We should pretend to make a zapyc movie and like keep on messing up because of what someone else does. Like a failed attempt on making the most epic movie ever. It could work for reals. We just need to start working on it asap. YAY!!!!! I love thinking of awesome ideas or ZAPYC Chibis! Like ok if anyone have any ideas of what type of epic movie we should try to fail at making please tell me asap.