5-28-09

♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥

More than half the time Aaron scares me because like he lies to be about being ok. That’s not an ok thing to do with me. I mean yes I get perfectly why he does this kind of thing but it’s not ok to do it with me. I’m the kind of person that can quiet perfectly if you’re lying to be just by your face. I love you Aaron. I don’t want you to ever lie to me even lying to be about your mental state is bad. Thing would be better if I knew the truth 24seven from you. Doesn’t matter if it would hurt me because I already know most of it would. Or at lest most of it should but probably won’t because many things have hurt me before. Now I feel like crying because you’re not around me and I need a hug badly. It’s not like anything is truly wrong it’s just that I need to know that life is better than what it’s made out to be. Aaron please with all your heart never leave me. Never hurt me. Never let me feel any type of pain. I want to feel happy 24seven in your arms and not have to deal with the bad in my life. I want to be able to live a life free of worries. Feel of everything bad… and know it’s all because of you. You created this safe place within my mind. Baby I want to be able to do the same for you. I want to be able to bring you joy and happiness for the rest of your life. This will mean that whatever happens no matter what we will always be together because our love should withstand anything. Anything God throws our way. Anything at all we should withstand… and stay happy because you’re the guy who makes me truly want to cry at night because I can’t be held in your arms or look deep into your eyes. I wish there was some way you could know all of this. I wish there was something I could do to show you how much I truthfully love you. I want to be able to not cry when I’m away from you… not even cry if I was away from you for only like a couple of hours. Like in school I’m perfectly fine but after school I’m not because I know that you’re not in the same building as me. That’s the part that really, really, really sucks the most. I wish to just make you the happiest guy ever on this planet earth. Also I wish no harm against you ever and if I can make sure it doesn’t happen it won’t. Is it ok for a pink haired freak of nature to just cry her eyes out and feel almost no pain? Can a pink haired freak of nature not stop thinking about someone amazing and not feel any pain either? NO, that’s not possible. I need to be with you forever Aaron. I need to make your life whole and fulfilled forever. I love you with all my heart and soul baby. Without you in my life I would die!!!